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I really don't know what to say. I've actually started writing a couple different times in the last 2 days and I just can't without saying too much, OR on the other hand, without saying too little, at which point I come off as inauthentic or cold. Then I realize that it doesn't matter what I say or how I respond because the fact is, I shouldn't, yet for some reason I'm still compelled to... So the best response I can give is to say- I'm glad you're well and I'm glad your family is well. We've both been fortunate in that. And for that reason, I know all of the things we would or wouldn't say are really of no importance. Neither is whether or not I still think of you or the past, or how I felt after running into you. I've dealt with all of my own feelings of happiness, sadness and anger where you and I are concerned and I'd like to leave them in that box they're in now. As far as your feelings of the same nature, I only hope you've been able to deal with them as I have. It's true that time does heal, and it has- not everything, but most things thankfully. Those things it hasn't healed will probably never be healed, but they are put away and buried. That's the safest place for them to be and where I hope they'll stay. I've been able to, finally, put myself back together to some degree. It took 2 years to get to the point where I was ok enough emotionally and mentally to even begin the process of putting myself back together, but I got there. In the last year I've been able to get to a place where I can get my head around everything and accept what's happened and what is. So many other, unrelated things have happened in the last few years too and I can't tell you how devastating it's all been. But I survived it, literally. I'm still here and I'm alive, and I'm also more sure of and feeling better about myself than I ever have. That doesn't mean I'm a better person for it or that I'm back to who I was before all of it because I don't think that's ever going to be possible. It just means I'm forever changed in ways I don't believe you could comprehend. I'm not damaged or broken anymore either. I'm just a different person than I was and I've learned to trust myself more because of it all. And with that, I can honestly say that I'm happy again and I hope you are too. XoXo
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